As an introduction and my first post I wanted to give a little bit of background around me.
My name is Rich, my disability is one that a lot of people wouldn’t class as a disability at all, I have Generalised Anxiety which I have suffered with for as long as I can remember, however after years and years of struggling with that I decided to try and get some answers which means I am now going through tests for ADHD & Autism.
What does having ADHD & Anxiety mean for me on a day-to-day basis? I overthink a lot of small problems into really big problems, making problems out of things that don’t even exist. I don’t adjust well to change, for example when people change my day last minute, the outcome to that is I get frustrated, and it is assumed I am just being really short and I really don’t mean it.
It has been really hard to make and keep friends over the years, I struggle to read people and will often take someone’s critique or feedback as a direct reflection on me and shut down. To protect myself, I can push others away because ultimately the end goal is to prevent a panic attack.
I like things to be structured and will ask questions sometimes more than once to make sure I have fully understood. I have a need for reassurance that what I have understood is correct, which can cause people to be frustrated, it also makes me feel really conscious because I don’t want to be a bother to people. “we will see” is probably the worst thing someone could say to me.
I find it hard to take breaks because I don’t want to be seen as skiving which feeds into the problem because I need a break to keep my brain healthy to stop myself worrying and it becomes a massive circle.
I have definitely faced situations in life where people who lack an understanding of mental health just think I am a worrier and get upset really easily.
Knowing that I could have ADHD created concerns. I wasn’t sure what people were going to think, how can he have ADHD.
People think ADHD is just people who are hyper, talk a lot, are loud or any other label you would like to put on it however ADHD is part of a spectrum, there is no right and wrong way to be ADHD. It affects people differently. Growing up with undiagnosed ADHD often means that as an adult you have coping mechanisms or masks to get you through the day that hides away the external symptoms this makes it even harder when you do finally tell people because it then becomes a case of “you can’t have that can you?”.
Anxiety & ADHD doesn’t define me and although some of the things I have shared make me sound prickly, these are things you would ultimately never ever have found out about me, but it is important that we share to break down the barriers.